Monday, September 15, 2008

Ladies, it's come down to this:

Id like to present to you two emails I woke up to this morning.
They represent the wide WIDE range of options I have recently been frantically pursuing in my desperation NOT to have to accept yet another NY corporate job ive been offered.
(WHY ME?! no seriously!! why do I -playwright, poet, supposed free spirit- continue to only be able to land jobs in the ONE city I dont want to live in, in the ONE field of work im totally opposed to???)
Clearly i'm cut out to be a soul-less drone.

Its obviously advertised all over me and i blame you people for not informing me of it earlier. Thats totally your job as friends. "uh, hey, D, i think you've got a little somethin on your face there... lets see, oh, hey, wow, SOUL-LESS DRONE IS WRITTEN ACROSS YOUR FOREHEAD."
Well, i think these emails really are very telling of how crazy it is in my head as a result of this most agonizing time in all our lives:

Dear Daisy,

Wow, what's a Yankee like you doing looking to wrangle way out in the west? Well, we'd love to have you down here on the ranch but unfortunately all of our horses head down to lower pastures by November. We are open year round and need help over the winter but its for cooking and housekeeping. There is outdoor work as well but mainly around shoveling and ferrying guests on snowmobiles. If you're keen on any of that you just let me know. Otherwise, please send your resume if you're interested in the possibility of wrangling next summer.

Thanks.

Jack Allard
Owner
Coulter Lake Guest Ranch


And then:


Daisy,
I would be glad to talk with you. Please call my assistant Catherine and let's set up a time for you to come into the agency or get on the phone.
Thanks,


Phil
Chief Brand Officer


...in case you didnt notice, I included links to the two establishments in question here...
just so you could see how EFFING CRAZY MY JOB SEARCH REALLY IS.
good news is, phil is a D grad and as you can see, the CBO of a massive and very wonderful pr/branding firm that i would very very much like to be a part of.
they came up with the "Truth" campaigns, as in, anti-tobacco, among other things.
but of course thats only a D-network connection and i might go all the way into his office and it will come to nothing besides a lovely chat.
but at least, you know, if that happens, i can always head down to Colorado and get keen on housekeepin!
(find below a picture of what ill be looking like when i come back. at least, in my mind)


sigh.
what have our lives devolved to?
or is it just me?
IM SO GLAD WERE DOING THIS BLOG!

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